I’ve lived in Georgia for a long time. Same neighborhoods. Same houses. Same routine. Once a year I knock politely, collect what I’m owed, and disappear until next time.

I don’t do well with freezing. I’m warm-blooded. I prefer room temperature and long walks around assessed values. I’m not asking for much. I just want to keep growing like a normal property tax should. Is that so unreasonable?

I travel around more than Property Tax. I show up after paydays. I do some math. I take my portion.

I’ve tried to be a good neighbor. I even invited people to my birthday, but no one showed up. Maybe next year?

But lately I’ve been hearing “cut in half.” I don’t even like pizza cutters!